I am just going to ramble right now! I just want to pen down whatever is going in my head these days and hopefully give me a better picture of where I stand and more importantly, where I need to go from here! Time is passing by quickly and I have to make decisions, do something, take initiative rather than just letting time pass. There are too many things – thoughts are running faster than I can write!
Life is full of ironies – however hard the effort I seem to put in to reach the next step in my life in the hope of relaxing and enjoying the new phase, I am made to realize the fleeting nature of the existing state of mind/body and required to keep putting in more effort to again chase those fleeting moments of happiness. Okay, I kinda understand what we are chasing are those moments of happiness, a highly personalized definition I might add; but is that strenuous effort required to achieve it and to be put it out more broadly, can we not pause our lives and still be happy? I guess not – however uncomfortable change might be, I seem to be never satisfied with the current existence. And the problem seems to be expectations or maybe in other words, dreams!
I have never lived any of my ideal dreams – maybe not even close I think – but still, probably like every other human being, I create those dreams and trudge through the present in the hope of achieving those dreams and living them happily one day.
My mom says this that I have always been like this, that is whenever I crib to her – being never satisfied and cribbing about life. She asks me to live my life – being happy and content of what you have!